Awareness of our situation
taken from the "Career Repair Kit" by David Royston-Lee
We may find ourselves at one of the stages of transition that everyone goes through to some degree in times of change and upheaval.
In my experience there are four areas and one door to go through:
- Denial – a period where you cannot believe it is happening to you…“it’s a bad dream I’ll wake up soon” kind of feeling
- Resistance – to what is happening, trying to hold on to the past…a “why should I change!” kind of feeling
- Going through the door of ‘letting go’ is next…moving from a negative and resistant attitude to one of accepting the reality and a willingness to change
- Exploration – of oneself in the first instance in terms of what this change means for me…and then exploration of the world outside me in terms of what would be a better way of living
- Identification – with a new way of being and a new way of living.
This process relies heavily on the work of Eizabeth Kübler-Ross in her work around bereavement.
The first two stages can take a few minutes to a few years. It is important to really understand how you are feeling in the early stages of redundancy as you may feel you are working from an ‘exploratory’ standpoint and still be in the denial phase.
Things that will help you gauge where you are:
- Get in touch with how you are feeling (try the 'three hugs' exercise to get started)
- Check with others how they are seeing you operate at this time (be careful to ask those who will be horribly honest with you)
- Analyse what you are doing… if it is lots of sending off of CV’s and very little talking and going to see people then you have a problem.
- …finally, can you truly say you are in control of what you are doing… if you say ‘yes’ then that is also a sign that you are not exploring because exploring by it’s very nature means you have no idea what is coming next!...
Three Hugs
Taken from the Career Repair Kit 'Three Hugs' is an exercise that helps you understand how you are feeling.
Exercise: 'Three Hugs'